2k12 Watashi no kokoro wa anata ni zokushi My Heart Belongs To You
by Momo-Flying-Lemur
Summary: Emerald met sapphire and their gaze only lasted for a moment until the last raspy breath was taken in the form of a whisper. The words were bittersweet but happy, "Watashi no kokoro wa anata ni zokushi." And then the hand he was holding fell limp and those eyes closed forever. His brother gave him everything he had….even though he didn't want it. {{T-cest warning.}}


Watashi no kokoro wa anata ni zokushi {{My Heart Belongs To You}}

**Ch1: Heart Murmur**

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A year…that's all they had left to spend with their eldest brother Leonardo. Three hundred and sixty five days and then he'd be gone…unless Donatello found a way to fix his heart. Leonardo's heart was failing. While Donatello was giving his brothers a regular check over for this year to make sure they all had a clean bill of health he came across something alarming.

When he was checking Leo's heart he heard something odd. At first he didn't want to believe it, but he knew he had. So he checked again and discovered that Leo had a heart murmur. Now this wasn't uncommon, sometimes heart murmurs were innocent and posed no threat and they'd soon correct themselves.

But upon further inspection and tests Donnie came to the terrifying conclusion that this heart murmur wasn't going to go away. This heart murmur was lethal. Donnie estimated how long Leo had to live based on how strong the heart murmur was and he came up with a year.

He hadn't told anyone yet; he was sitting upon his chair in his lab as he clutched the test results in his hands. His green knuckles so rigid they turned yellowish-white. He tried to calm himself, but how could he when he knew his older brother was slowly dying?

Donatello slammed the piece of paper down on his desk and buried his face into his hands and propped his elbows upon the desk. It had been two years since The Invasion happened and two years since they drove Shredder out of New York. Dimension X had been totally destroyed and the turtles reunited with their Sensei and found a new Lair.

Apparently Leo had been more injured internally than they had come to believe. Sure they knew he had been injured to the verge of death but he pulled through that. But now they might be losing him for good this time.

Leo's heart must have been put under some type of stress or strain when he stood alone against all odds battling Shredder's forces. The stress had caused internal damage to his vital organ and now it was costing him his life.

How could Donnie have missed that? How had he missed that? Donatello could feel hot tears welling up in his eyes and he rubbed at his tear ducts to stop the tears from being shed. He removed his hands from his face and took a furtive glance down at the test papers.

How the hell do you break it to your family members that a loved one is dying? Better yet how the hell do you tell the dying family member that they only had so much to live? It was impossible! This would break them! This would tear them all apart!

They needed their older brother, those three months Leo was in a coma proved that. It was already breaking Donatello slowly. How…how could he? Should he just wait? Or would it be wrong to wait?

Should he just silently work himself to death, poor choice of words, until he found someway to save his older brother and just let this whole thing blow over silently leaving all his brothers unaware? Should he just wait until he had a plan on how to fix Leo's heart and then drug him and perform surgery and then act like nothing ever happened?

No he couldn't do that. They had the right to know…Leo most of all had the right to know. Donnie had no choice but to tell his family. He had to do it and do it soon, besides perhaps if they all worked together they could find a way to save their older brother, or at least prolong his life.

With the unrelenting fear nestling itself into his heart, Donnie rose from his chair and took the paper up into his hands. And with his feet he walked, that felt like two blocks of concrete, agonizingly and slowly made his way to his lab door. He came to a halt by the door and inhaled sharply. He held the breath in his lungs that ached with a silent sob forming within his throat, and then he exhaled and timidly reached for the door handle.

The light of the living area just about burned Donnie's sight away it was so blinding. His door lab creaked as he pushed the door open and then when his vision corrected itself he saw his family members all turn to him. Splinter was hovering over Leonardo who was curled up, his head resting on Raph's crossed legs.

In Leo's hands he clutched one of Raph's dark skinned hands. Raphael whom had previously been gazing down at Leo in concern lifted his head just enough so as to look up at Donnie.

Mikey was sitting on the other side of Raph, the orange masked turtle's eye ridges were creased and his baby blue eyes were glazed over in worry. He too only lifted his head slightly to lock his baby blue orbs in Donnie's burgundy stare.

Donnie bit his bottom lip as he let the scene soak in. It would have been a peaceful scene a scene of a happy family, a happy memory if not for Leo's skin being as pale as it was. If not for his frequent shuddering and uneven breath, he was curled up in agony.

"**Donatello?"** Splinter was the first to speak; the old rat had crossed the length of the living room and had stopped just a few inches shy of his genius son. His voice had been just a delicate and fleeting whisper. The mutant rat obviously was as anxious as everyone else. Donnie must have figured out what was wrong with Leo. And judging by Donnie's crestfallen face Splinter knew that the news must be grave.

Donnie opened his mouth as if to say something but the words that he tried to speak seemed to have a mind of their own. Instead of the words forming into the air like they should they seemed to encircle his lungs and constrict in a vice like iron. All that came from the purple masked turtle was a strangled sobbing noise.

The paper that was previously clutched in his hand slipped from his numb fingers as he brought his hands up to his mouth to muffle his sob. As the paper hit the floor, so did Donnie himself. He sank to his knees and his eyes burned with the tears collecting in their ducts.

"**D?"** Mikey was the first to react as he leaped from the couch and landed onto the floor and sprinted to his immediate older brother's side. He crouched down and placed a hand on his shoulder. **"Donnie? Donnie….Donnie what's wrong? Hey!"** Mikey got no response from Donnie other than a shudder and a stare of anguish. He pulled his hand back. **"D-Don?"** He whispered his voice so low it was almost inaudible. **"Don you're scaring me."**

"**Donatello."** Splinter as well knelt down at the purple masked terrapin's side. **"My son, please calm yourself. You are frightening your brothers and me. Please try and breathe, then tell us what you found out." **Even though the mutated ninja master was dreading what his son had discovered not knowing was worse than knowing. At least if they knew what was going on with Leonardo they could get an idea on how to go about helping him.

Donnie swallowed back his sobs, trying to keep them imprisoned at the back of his throat. He blinked away the tears from his eyes and nodded. Sensei was right; Donnie could see the terror creeping into Mikey's eyes as he stared at him. The olive skinned turtle let his gaze wander from Mikey over to Raphael and Leonardo.

Raph was staring at him with wide emerald eyes a scowl upon his face, but Donnie knew that this was just a front. The red masked turtle had obviously been shaken by what had just occurred. Their gaze was only broken when Leo gave out a small whimper in pain and took in a sharp and agonized gasp.

The red masked turtle immediately looked down at Leo, **"Easy bro."** He warned softly, trying to keep his voice as even as he could manage to force it to be. Raph didn't know if he even desired for Donnie to tell them the verdict. After that display of sorrow and water works even he was terrified of what might be ailing his only older brother.

"**D-Don?"** Donnie's eyes widened, it was Leo's raspy and questioning voice that snapped him out of his self induced trance. He now only just realized that his gaze had been lingering upon the floor. Burgundy met glazed over sapphire eyes.

With a trembling hand Donnie managed to reach out and scoop the paper off of the floor. He clutched the paper so tight that his knuckles turned that weird yellowish-white color as he handed the paper off to Splinter.

"**He's…he's dying…Leo's dying."** Those words forcing themselves out of his vocal cords felt as if he had spat up fire. His whole insides burned with unrelenting anguish and torment. Donnie buried his face into his hands and muffled his whimpering sobs.

There was a heart crushing silence that seemed to last an eternity before Raph broke the silence with a strained, **"What? Donnie what?! What do you mean Leo's dying?!"** As this point the dark skinned turtle could no longer hide behind his façade and it was clear as day he was as terrified as the rest of them. He only stopped talking when he felt Leo tense and he once more looked down upon his suffering older brother….his dying older brother.

Leo's whole world came to a train wrecking halt. All his thoughts had vanished, up until this point in time he had been comforting his family members telling them he was fine and that he probably just overworked himself.

Now that Donnie came back and confirmed that something was indeed wrong and something was seriously wrong at that, the sapphire eyed turtle shifted his head until he could bury his face into Raph's leg. His breath seemed to still in his throat and linger in his lungs until he choked it out. It took a few tormenting minutes for the words to finally sink in.

He was dying. God. He was dying. He had been expecting that he had just overdone it and that he had pushed himself beyond his limits but never had he expected to be told that he was dying. He hadn't mentally prepared himself for anything such as unsettling at this and he couldn't stop the rising fear that took form of a sob in his throat.

The blue masked turtle released the sob and clutched his hands around Raph's hand tighter. The fear caused the minty skinned turtle to quake in tremors, he curled up even more. His heart seized up in pain for a few minutes, causing the turtle to let out a grunt of discomfort. His heart settled down only after skipping a few beats.

All had gone still and silent and now one moved and it seemed everyone held their breaths. Mikey finally broke the silent air that seems to have turned into ice with a small broken and uneven inhale and exhale.

He shivered and looked back and forth between all his family members. His heart beat escalated as the words stabbed into him like pin and needles. His whole body hurt as if he had fallen into a patch of sharp and prickly rose thorns.

His older brother….Leo was dying? Were those words even compatible enough to be in the same sentence? Donnie's forced words rang inside of Mikey's buzzing mind. This couldn't be, this just couldn't be. Leo couldn't be dying he just couldn't.

"**How long?"** Sensei's hushed voice caused everyone's stare, all but Leo's sapphire one, to land on him. **"How long Donatello?"** There was no doubt that all his sons could sense his unease and growing stress at Donnie's news. He had just finished reading the report and his eyes still lingered upon the white page that foretold his son's impending fate.

"**A year."** Donnie murmured out between a hiccup and a silent sob. He wiped his tears away and pushed himself to his feet. He made his feet carry him forward and he stopped besides the couch. He let his hand come to rest on the back of Leo's shell. **"I'm sorry…Leo. I'll do everything I can to try and fix this. I'm not going to just let you die, promise."**

The response he got from Leo was a muffled, **"Okay."** The blue masked turtle was floundering in a sea of his own unspoken dread. He didn't really know how to feel about this; all he knew was that he had a year left with his brothers, his father and their human friends Casey and April. Speaking of which they didn't know yet and they were as important as anyone in this family. They deserved to know. Leo turned his head to peek up at Donnie through half closed eyelids. **"You should tell April and Casey."**

Donnie gave him a numb nod.** "Leo has a heart murmur."** He stepped back to watch everyone's reactions. Leo tucked his face away back into Raph's dark skin. Mikey's stare fell to the floor. Splinter walked over to his recliner chair and slowly sank down into the leather fabric. Raph's emerald eyes gleamed in unshed tears and of frustration and sorrow.

"**Y-You can fix his heart….r-right Don?"** Raph could hardly get the words out it was as if his whole body had been dipped into icy water. All he felt at the moment was a throbbing numbness that spread through his body like venom.

"**Honestly…I don't know Raph. I just don't know. He has a large damaged heart valve which is what is causing his heart murmur. This thing isn't just easily fixed; I'd need to find a replacement for the valve. But…since we are mutants it's not as if we can use a human valve for a replacement." **At this point Donnie's mind took over and drowned his emotions for a while.

The medical side of him had blocked out all distractions. The genius turtle inhaled and exhaled, his thoughts settling. After he had a firm grip on his emotions he could finally answer Raph's question. **"I could try and make one myself, but it would take a long time to gather all the parts and even then Leo's body might reject the foreign substance which is the materials used in creating prosthetic heart valves."**

Raph gave Donnie a desolate stare. That wasn't the news he was hoping for, he had tried to convince himself it would be an easy fix even after Donnie broke down like that. He was trying to deny and lie to himself that everything would be fine. But things weren't fine…far from it.

"**How long Donnie?" **He was trying to remain strong; he didn't want to break down into tears. He wouldn't and he couldn't. Not in front of everyone. Raphael knew it was his responsibility now to remain calm and be the support his family needed. He couldn't break. He couldn't show how in ruins he was inside. For his family's sake he would remain stoic.

"**It could take a few weeks to a few months…or even close to a year. It all depends on how long it takes for me to gather all the material and for me to build the valve and have it in working condition and it's all up to Leo then. The odds aren't in our favor. There's always a large chance that a body will reject an item that is not organic from its system." **Donnie hated being so blunt about it, but it was true. Not even he could estimate how long of a time span it would take from him to acquire all said parts for a makeshift heart valve that would not only work but would last and not break apart.

"**Okay." **Raph's reply was just as blunt as Donnie's statement, he tore his gaze away from Donnie and let it land on Leo's curled up figure. The blue masked turtle seemed to have dozed off. His breathing had returned to normal, signaling that the murmur had evened itself out. **"Well what are you waiting for Don?"**

"**Oh…right sorry." **Donnie shook his head and turned away to retreat to his lab, the tails of his purple mask trailing after him as the door shut with a small click indicating that the olive skinned turtle had locked himself in his lab. That meant only one thing, he'd be cooped up in there for days frantically researching turtle anatomy and their hearts and the shape and sizes of their hearts and compare them to their own mutant hearts.

Raph didn't tear his gaze away from his older brother, not even when Splinter spoke with Mikey and took the distraught freckled teen into the kitchen for some calming tea. Raph slowly leaned down and his face was only inches away from Leo's head. **"No matter what happens, even if Donnie can't make a heart valve for you I'm not going to let you die bro. I'll make sure of that, I promise."**

And that was a promise Raphael intended to keep.

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A/N: Well didn't this start off all just sunshine and rainbows? But no seriously, what a start huh? Right off the get go we learn that Leo's dying and everyone's on edge and Donnie's going to be stressing out for the next 365 days trying to makeshift a new heart valve for Leo that may or may not be successful. And it seems our favorite turtle in red is determined to save his big bro no matter what. How will this turn out? Only I know and it's for you to read on to find out. Until next time my dear readers! Also it would be much appreciated if you left a cute little review for me to marvel at while I work on the next enthralling chapter, it helps keep me motivated! Thanks for reading and see you in the next exciting chapter! Au revoir my fair readers!


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